I don’t want to be rude, but if that's all it takes you deserve to be captured. Other things you hated as a kid that as an adult you are good with: Going to bed and sleeping, brushing your hair, and beer. Just so you have a gage of how I am as a person. I also promised my wife I would be home on time for dinner and that I wouldn’t cheat on her. That should fix everything! #26 I tried.Įverytime I am about to murder someone I just think to myself.hey if I could have a cup of coffee all of this would go away. #25 the moment when you ran out of coffee.Įasy, find the person in charge of buying the coffee and scream at them till they cry. I guess except the stupid people, they prolly wouldn’t get on board. So you prolly don’t want to be standing next to him when it happens. When it does kick in just realize that this is a lion. #22 No.1 mommy coffee hackĪs long as you don’t put the kids in the microwave I think we are ok. I think you and I are having very different kinds of orgasums. Is this what Sia looks like in the morning? Does she have a tiny dancer that mimes drinking coffee around her kitchen while she is chugging down? #21 coffeegasm I wish coffee to trick me into thinking you were a good person for 27 seconds. I mean will you want less coffee on Tuesday? I have a feeling you won't. What if the house was on fire? Or the zombies were right outside your door? I hear you, you said what you said. Should I grab HR real quick? #17 but first. Janet, you look like you have to tell me something, but you also look like you want to kill me. Did we also mention this woman is dead inside? that thing in my coffee cup. A time when women in ads couldn’t wait to catch a man with her fantastic stockings or her delicious cigarette. But you choose me, now your stuck with me. Me barley being presentable and nice to the world. No today is much like yesterday and also tomorrow. No today is also not the day I will choose to brush my hair or wash my face apparently.
Well it doesn’t make me feel like my stepmother has enslaved me and I am finally rebelling only with the help of magic in hopes to find a man to save and fix my situation. Let’s start this day out with a bang! #13 makes me feel.
Please refer back to 1 #12 it's safe now.īut when you come out please also bring me lollipops and song. I look dam good holding this drink and 2. ♪♫Coffee in the morning, coffee in the evening, coffee at supper time♪♪ #11 I wonderīut you are glossing over the best parts. WE WILL NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN! #10 ideal time #9 redbullĭON’T GO FIND OUT WHAT THAT NOISE IS. You know how they say exercising is a great way to start your day? To me it is a great way to get me to nap. And you can’t really prove that it’s not. I always tell my husband that MY body is 98% coffee. Don’t look it up, just take our word for it. How come it is so easy to drink three cups of coffee in less than an hour but so hard to drink 8 glasses of water in a whole day? #6 when i smell.ĭid you know people's favorite smells are in this order: Playdough, Fresh Baked Bread, and Coffee. Maybe now that the coffee is brewing go wash your face and put on clean clothes. Give yourself a high five for doing so much in only ten minutes and take a break anyway. Opened email, checked Facebook, made a list of to dos. But your coffee helper is more in the way then help.
THIS COFFEE WILL WAKE ME UP MEME HOW TO
The fumbling around for measurements as your brain tries to remember how to fill the back with water. Have you ever tried to help someone make coffee in the morning. What happens in the kitchen in the morning stays in the kitchen in the morning. These are the moments I wake up and am so glad I am not a star of a reality show with cameras watching my every move. Take a sip ☕ and get ready as we jump right in 😂 #1 When you're a parent waking up. Nothing beats starting the day with a warm cup of coffee and inject bouts of laughter to lighten the mood.
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